fly mama

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

Mom Power!

Well....sickness has come, as sickness does. It usually starts with Peyton and one by one we are taken down. Lucy is the sickest at the moment, at least she was as of last night. I fear that my admitting that I might be taking first place might actually make me sicker (is that possible?). I have been to the doctor 3 times in the past 2 weeks. The first was merely for vaccines-this is possibly where we became infected.....we might never know (*insert Twilight Zone music here). It was a few short days after that, that Peyton became congested. I medicated accordingly and watched....waited.....jumped at every sneeze and cough. Before too long (with a bit of Peyton’s help.......blowing in his sister’s face, which he was told NOT to do when he’s sick!) Lucy came down with it. I hate going into the weekend with sick kiddos. Last Friday found us back at the doctor’s office with all of the other sickos! This I thought would be the end of it.....surely I was taking all of the right measures, right? HA! Obviously not....this bug is stronger then any arsenal of medication that I am equipped with. Monday Lucy was we flew first thing in the morning to the doctor. I was SO proud of myself.....I pulled up to his office at 8:15 a.m.-sure I had beat all the other sickos wrong I was. I could feel myself getting sick just sitting in the waiting room. Finally, in we went. An hour wait.....a 5 minute visit.....3 prescriptions....2 lollipops......and an INVISIBLE goody bad of cooties later-and we were on our way! I swear we leave with more then we go in there with. I have thought about placing masks over my kids mouths when we go in there, but I love our doctor and would rather not insult him. He clearly is the busiest physician in all of Texas-I have never seen a busier place-not even the bank on a Friday afternoon rivals Dr. Reddy Akkanti’s office in Bastrop, Texas. I think.......possibly we might have a grasp on this thing. Of course, today has to be better then yesterday. Yesterday was a 10 call day. Ten calls to mom that is! I don’t know why I find comfort in her knowing how miserable I am....I just do. Lucy was in a state of hysterics all day.....I felt like a Mac truck ran over my head and burned rubber. So.....I did what any rational 33 year old mother of 2 would mom! It’s not like she can drop what’s she’s doing and can come over and help. There are 1500 very long miles between us-Maybe it’s the sound of her voice....or rather her screaming at the top of her lungs in response to my hysterics that, "I can’t take it anymore....Lucy is crying and Peyton is bored....and Jeremy is working late...and"......"YOU CAN DO IT!" she screams..."YOU WILL DO IT!" All of the sudden there is calm. I hope I have this mom power some day. I hope that once my children grow up and move out-that they will want to hear my voice when they are down or not feeling well. That I can comfort them no matter how many miles are between us. That even when they are adults, I can raise my voice and wipe away all doubts about moving forward (whether it’s job related, relationship related...whatever). That mom power never goes away, my mother has proven that to me. OH! Sure, there are times where she pisses me off.....and I know there are times that I piss her off. We don’t always see eye to eye and I’d be lying to say that our relationship has always been great. I think as an adult I have come to accept her as she is and she has come to accept me as I am. But, it’s moments like this that I catch myself in tears......with a sick baby and feeling ill myself-that I cry to her and beg her..."I am SO sorry for everything I ever did horrible to please make this stop!" I know she has mom power, but I don’t think her mom power can actually alter the behavior of my children (although she "wished" a whiney child on me to make up for all the whining I did to her as a child), maybe mom power is stronger then I think. Maybe we have the power to alter the future.....wish children on our children so that they can relate someday to what we ourselves have been through. I truly hope this is not the case...although I would LOVE some secret power like this, but then I remember what I was like as a teenager-and that thought scares me immensely., when you are reading this, bear in mind that I wasn’t misbehaving deliberately....I apologize for dating a 21 year old when I was 15....I apologize for sneaking out at night, skipping school, for going to Miami when I was told I couldn't. I apologize for anything and everything that I did! Maybe, just maybe- grandma wished my behavior on you! Just a thought! (*once again....insert Twilight Zone music here)


At 11:27 AM, Blogger HBelle said...

makes me miss MY mom!! hang in there baby, i'm sending some strong healthy vibes your way... xo

At 10:21 AM, Anonymous positive mental attitude said...

Thanks--take a look at the mind power tools at


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